2007 - The Year of "Now"
I've been spending many years trying to find some "resting spots" for my soul. Reading books. Philosophical conversations. Middle-of-the-night epiphanies. All leading me to a lifestyle that is much less tumultuous and more aligned with a clear conscience. I have learned to focus on the "now" and breathe in the moments I'm experiencing. It's hard work. And it's a work in progress. I have found my thoughts disciplined to focus on what is real and not wander off to the theater of my thinking process. Oh, it can be wonderful at times, like a good movie - inspiring, motivating and surreal. How I would love to go there right now. So much hope. So much faith. So much love.
And then there are the tragic comedies in my head that I fall into once in a while. You know, one thought leaning toward the negative latches onto another dark thought and so on and the nightmare train begins to roll. Before I know it my mind has jumped aboard the Crazy Train..haha..taking me to that scary place called Fear.
It's a good thing I've learned to separate myself from the Thinker. People used to say "Vig, you think too much."
Huh? That's what I'd say. What the hell were they talking about. Do they want me to shut down? Maybe. Maybe they are comfortable with not being progressive and creative in their thinking. But they're also right to a degree. I can think too much. My creativity creates a reality. My brain starts thinking it's actually true, when it isn't.
I've learned to recognize it when it starts to happen. I derail the train of thought. I "capture my thoughts" and "Make them obedient" to the present moment. The results are incredibly freeing
What is..is all there is.
Comments
Thanks for getting back to me, and checking out my blog. And your blog -- wow! You've taken me by surprise! I wasn't aware there were any deep thinking, hot guys out there (yeah, I know I'm so shallow). I've learned for the most part how to keep my addictive thinking tendancies in check, but sometimes I have to write to sort out all my thoughts. I sent you to my blog to view my photo (keeping my fingers crossed that you wouldn't read it and think I was a nut-case) most guys find that type of writing a turn-off. My schedule is ridiculous at the moment, but would you be interested in meeting me for a coffee sometime in the not so distant future? If not, that's okay - I'm not putting too much faith into the realm of online dating. You can erase this message if you want and/or email me at: codebecca@yahoo.com if you want to keep in touch. Thanks again for writing. -Beck
P.S. Concerning Fear: (not that I'm without) but I'm learning in a course I'm taking that our sense of "fear" is actually an attraction to life, or survival. One of my favorite quotes is by Eleanor Roosevelt. She said: "Do one thing every day that scares you."